News News of the Week

News of the Week: Eagles Hit Number One, the iMac Turns 20, and Millennials Murder Mayonnaise

Box of Barnum

Michael Jackson vs. the Eagles, Spherical 36

I hear from a really dependable supply that pop music is best than ever. I don’t occur to agree, however then once more I’m an previous fogey who is about in his methods in terms of music, and would moderately take heed to my kitchen faucet drip all night time than take heed to one thing by Kanye West. (Word to self: get kitchen faucet fastened.)

There are rather a lot of individuals like that, and apparently they’re all shopping for Eagles and Michael Jackson albums. They’ve been battling for many years. Some years the Eagles’ Biggest Hits (1971-1975) is the number-one-selling album of all time, and different years Jackson’s Thriller is in the prime spot. It simply so occurs that this week Don Henley and firm can brag a bit bit, although I’m unsure if it’s truthful that a biggest hits album goes up towards one particular album in an artist’s catalogue. Then once more, perhaps it’s spectacular that one album can problem a well-liked band’s biggest hits album. The Eagles 1976 album has bought 38 million copies, whereas Jackson’s 1982 album has bought 33 million (counting each album gross sales and on-line). Elaine’s boyfriend Brett should personal a number of copies of that Eagles album.

Positive, the Eagles are No. 1 proper now, however perhaps Jackson will come out on prime ultimately. You recognize … in the long term.

The Pc That Modified Every part

I keep in mind stepping into an argument with a good friend of mine in 1997 — truly, a pal of a good friend — about the destiny and future of Apple. He thought the firm was about to exit of enterprise, and I assumed they might someday achieve success once more.

Admittedly, the firm went by way of some actually dangerous occasions in the ’90s, and it’s not like I had any psychic visions of the iPod or the iPhone (I’d have a much bigger checking account if that have been the case). However I did know that Apple made nice issues and that their clients have been loyal. I knew they’d be again in an enormous means ultimately.

Apple turned the first trillion-dollar firm a pair of weeks in the past, and it actually began with a pc I beloved, the iMac (I owned the Bondi Blue one). It’s presently celebrating its 20th anniversary, and I want Apple nonetheless made it, hockey puck mouse and all. It was retro and futuristic, nostalgic and forward-looking, all at the similar time.

It’s superb how the pc influenced not simply the pc business, however popular culture too. Different tech corporations began to repeat sure options (or lack thereof) of the iMac, and everyone began to launch merchandise with rainbow colours. That even continues to today.

Walmart Honors Buying Cart Woman

All of us have our pet peeves: the little issues in life that annoy us. Some of us can’t stand individuals who drive too slowly, and some of us hate it when individuals chew their meals loudly or cough into their hand. I occur to consider that individuals who don’t return their buying carts to the carriage corrals are on par with murderers and arsonists.

Truthfully, is there something lazier? You’ll be able to’t take 10 seconds to put your cart into the corral after you’ve loaded your groceries into your automotive? Each time I’m going to the grocery store, I see random carts throughout the place, blocking parking areas and lanes. I’ve even seen individuals convey their carts to the aspect of the carriage corral and depart it there as a result of they’re too rattling lazy to convey it a number of extra ft round to the corral’s opening. It drives me loopy.

So a spherical of applause to 70-year-old grandmother Sue Johnson of West Virginia, honored by Walmart just lately for returning her cart to the corral throughout an enormous rain and wind storm. She acquired free grocery pickup for a yr and a trophy formed like — you guessed it — a purchasing cart.

Assume of Sue the subsequent time you don’t return your cart when it’s 70 levels and sunny.

The Cookie Cage

Box of Barnum's Animal Crackers, with the animals out of their cages.


Rating one for PETA.

In 2016, the animal rights group wrote a letter to Mondelez Worldwide, the proprietor of Nabisco, to get them to replace the entrance of their animal cracker bins so the animals are out of their cages. Looks like the firm truly listened. The brand new packing containers just lately made their debut.

Positive, we may be comfortable that the animal cookies (come on, they’re extra cookie than cracker) at the moment are free from their cages, however you realize that 5 minutes later that lion sank his tooth into the giraffe’s neck.

Maintain the Mayo

These rattling millennials. They’re answerable for the destruction of every thing. They’re destroying the cereal business as a result of they don’t need to clear their bowls; they don’t go to the films as a result of they’d somewhat binge-watch one thing on Netflix; and they shun happening dinner dates for some cause. They even hate napkins! How are they wiping their faces after they eat their avocado toast and kale salads? With their sleeves?

Now you can add mayo to the record of issues younger individuals don’t hassle with. Sure, they’re mayo-haters, which suggests they’re lacking out on creamy potato salad and tuna fish sandwiches the approach tuna fish sandwiches are presupposed to be made. One of the causes is as a result of they don’t like the texture and they assume it’s too disgusting to eat. They do know they’re not purported to eat mayo like ice cream, proper?

I hate this story for the easy purpose it has launched me to the phrase “identity condiments.” I had by no means heard of that idea earlier than and I’m sorry I do know what it’s now. Quickly schools are going to should arrange protected areas for college kids who don’t need to cope with ketchup they don’t agree with.

By the method, can we cease blaming millennials for every part? Not that they don’t deserve rather a lot of the blame for RUINING EVERYTHING, however we have now to direct our ire at the right age group. Everybody appears to place any “young” individual into the millennial class. Individuals of their teenagers or 20 aren’t millennials! They’re … properly, no matter era comes after that. I’ve hassle protecting monitor of all of the totally different names. Era Y? Era Z? As a Gen-Xer, I want to name them “the generation who will never know what it’s like not to own a smartphone.”

RIP Barbara Harris, Kofi Annan, Don Cherry, and Miriam Nelson

Barbara Harris was an acclaimed Broadway actress who additionally appeared in such films as Nashville, Household Plot, Peggy Sue Obtained Married, Grosse Pointe Clean, and Who’s Harry Kellerman and Why Is He Saying These Horrible Issues About Me?, for which she acquired an Oscar nomination. She died final week at the age of 83.

Kofi Annan was a former secretary common of the United Nations and a winner of the Nobel Peace Prize. He died Saturday at the age of 80.

Don Cherry was not solely a prime novice golfer, he was additionally a well-liked singer in the 1950s. That’s him singing “Band of Gold” in the very first scene of Mad Males. Cherry truly died in April, however his dying is simply now being reported. He was 94.

Miriam Nelson was a dancer and choreographer who not solely labored with such individuals as Judy Garland, Cole Porter, and Doris Day, she additionally labored on many Academy Award telecasts, labored as a choreographer at Disneyland, and even helped put collectively a number of Tremendous Bowl halftime exhibits. She died final week at the age of 98.

This Week in Historical past

Hawaii Turns into 50th State (August 21, 1959)

As if this summer time’s eruption of the Kīlauea volcano wasn’t sufficient destruction from nature, the islands at the moment are being hit by Hurricane Lane, which reached Class four standing this week.

“Please Mr. Postman,” First Motown No. 1, Launched (August 21, 1961)

The Marvelettes track was later coated by a number of different bands, together with the Beatles and the Carpenters.

This Week in Saturday Night Submit Historical past: Drink of Water (August 22, 1914)

The child on this Frank X. Leyendecker cowl ought to actually put these papers down earlier than he drinks from the fountain.

A jockey and his horse takes a drink of water out of a fountain.

Drink of Water
Frank X. Leyendecker
August 22, 1914

Quote of the Week

“I might not rate her as the single greatest female vocalist of the rock era — Kelly Clarkson and Linda Ronstadt come to mind as more versatile across more genres and more varied in their emotional resonances …”

—an precise sentence written by Dan McLaughlin in his Nationwide Evaluation obituary for Aretha Franklin.

Nationwide Waffle Day

You ever assume of a meals and abruptly understand you haven’t eaten it in years? That’s how I felt once I came upon at present is Nationwide Waffle Day. I’m not likely a waffle man and haven’t eaten them in in all probability 15 or 20 years. If I’m going to eat one thing in that household, it will be pancakes or French toast. However when you like them, right here’s a recipe from Curtis Stone for Entire Wheat Waffles with Strawberry-Maple Syrup. Looks like an excessive amount of work for me. I’d in all probability simply purchase a field of Eggo.

Don’t get me mistaken. Selfmade waffles are good! They’re simply not “Kelly Clarkson good.”

Subsequent Week’s Holidays and Occasions

Nationwide Rest room Paper Day (August 26)

I don’t even need to understand how you’re going to have fun it.

U.S. Open (August 27)

The tennis event is marking 50 years of being an “open” occasion, with particular celebrations and a model new Louis Armstrong stadium, which has a retractable roof.

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